Thursday, August 25, 2016

♫ set me free from everything I never really wanted to be...♫

I can with all honesty say that I'm not the same person I was a few months ago.
There are parts of me that are still the same...but a huge portion of who I am is a vastly different creature.
While I do mourn losing some of the girl I was, I'm beginning to enjoy the woman I've become.

I will not beg.
I will not wait.
I will not spill my heart out unless specifically asked to.
I know that I am 100% responsible for my own happiness.
I will not sacrifice who I am, or what I want while caring for anyone else.
I will never lose myself in a relationship again.
I will live my life the way I want, and you can either accept it or fuck off.

I'm a lot stronger...and much more confident in who I am.

My relationships (friends/family/romantic) have benefited from this transformation. I've learned to set boundaries, and not tolerate it when people habitually cross them. I've learned that it's okay to say 'no', and concentrate on what I need. I've learned how to care for other people, and still be my own person/care for myself. I've learned that I have to make myself happy first.

I don't need another person to be happy.
I. do. not. need. you.
If you're in my life, it's because I want you there...otherwise I will not bother trying. If I start to feel like I'm being taken advantage of or treated unkindly I will remove you from my life, and not look back.
I know my worth. I know what I bring to the table, as they say.
I'm goddamn glorious and magical.
It's because I know my worth that I get to say what's good for me...I get to determine what I will and will not tolerate...I say what I deserve.

These days, I'm very particular about who I allow into my life. I have no problem at all not returning messages I don't want to return, or sitting my ass at home with my cat and chickens (or going out alone). So, if I talk to you, if I hang out with you, I 100% legitimately want you in my life...I think you deserve to be in my life. I have no problem cutting people out of my life, so if I make an effort with you, you mean something to me.

I'm going to live my life. I'm going to do what's best for me. I'm going to enjoy myself as much as possible. If you want a place in all of that, great...make a place for yourself, and be honest and trustworthy. If you make a fucking mistake, fix it.

I don't ask anything that I wouldn't be willing to do myself.


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