Thursday, June 30, 2016

♫...We love fun cuz being sad is really dumb...♫

The blonder I get, the more confident I feel.
The more confident I feel, the happier I am.
The happier I am, the easier it is to move.the.fuck.on...and that's the goal. 100%, complete, and total letting go and moving on. I'm not one of those people who sits around hoping that their ex will 'come to their senses', and everything will go back to the dysfunctional way it was before. Nope. Not this girl. In the past I've been happy to just napalm the hell out of it, & move on without looking back.

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Dracarys, Bitches...

...which is odd when you take into consideration the fact that I'm still on friendly terms with all but 2 guys I've dated...and I've agreed to be friends with the most recent one as well. So, no napalm...but no sitting around holding on to the past either.

...but I digress...

Do blondes have more fun?
I hypothesize that it is those that are more confident that have more fun. For me, having light blonde hair makes me feel confident, sexy, like I am powerful AND I WILL TAKE WHAT IS MINE WITH FIRE AND BLOOD!!!! Pair it with my Kat Von D Archangel lipstick, and STAND BACK because mama is about to work her voodoo lady magic. It boosts my self-esteem, that in turn boosts my confidence, and that makes me feel like the absolute badass that I am.

People react to that sense of self-confidence in mind blowing ways. When I feel my happiest and most confident I have been amazed at the difference in how people interact with me. Strangers strike up conversations, the overwhelming majority of people are much kinder and more helpful, and, yes, people flirt more. For someone who has not always felt comfortable being the focus of attention, it has taken some getting used to. More than anything, I think people are reacting to my happiness, my open friendliness...even on the days when I have to fake it.

The trick, I think, is to find something that makes you feel like your best self. It doesn't have to be hair color or beauty related, just anything that makes you feel like the amazing person you really are. If you feel down, like you are rolling around on rock bottom without a hope in sight (like I was), take care of yourself first. Baby the hell out of you, and remind yourself that you are super-fucking-fantastic. There are still days when I have to repeat little uplifting mantras over and over again until I feel it, but it gets easier every day.

My new found confidence has also provided me with a sense of what I will and will not accept in my life, and in my relationships with others. In addition,  I've started creating much needed boundaries, and not putting up with people who do not respect them! Life is by no means perfect, but I feel happier, I feel much more free, I feel like I've left the past behind me (for the most part).
I like this. A lot.


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