Thursday, June 23, 2016

♫...a thousand splinters pierce right through my spoiled liver...♫

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When I was in the downward spiral of insanity and utter desolation that came immediately after being dumped...horribly...a friend sent me an article that hypothesized that Tylenol (or any brand of acetaminophen really) can help ease a broken heart. A psychologist conducted the study and there was a lot of neruoscience (my one true love) so I read a few other articles on the subject as well. Then I immediately drove up to the CVS near my home, and bought a big ass bottle of generic acetaminophen. Hell, I was desperate to not feel a goddamn thing...damn my liver to perdition, it's probably on its last legs anyway.

Now, I don't know if it actually worked...if the placebo effect took over...or if I was just too damn tired to really care anymore...but when I remembered to take it, I slipped into IDGAF mode. I exhibited the flat, emotionless state often displayed by DMV employees. I started feeling a little sad this morning, and decided to pop a couple (for the 1st time in a while), in an attempt to shut them bitch ass feelings DOWN. Again, I don't know if this actually worked, or if the placebo effect has taken over, making it work because I want it to work. All I know is that I ain't sad. I just don't care. At all. About anything. I vaguely recognize things that I should care about...I just can't work up the emotional commitment. That might not be the acetaminophen though. Maybe that's just the lack of sleep, and finally seeing things as they really are/were.

Whatever works.

Is constantly downing Tylenol healthy? No fucking way, but my liver is just going to have to man up and soldier on until I'm not so goddamn fragile.

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